The Gift of Unconditional Love: A Mother's Reflection

Tuesday after school, I prepared a snack for SDYM.

Now, that he is older, bigger, and requires more fuel, his after school snacks are full meals.

After I placed his plate in front of him, I asked him if he wanted a drink.

He said, “Yes. I’d like a Gatorade.”

But, before I could bend down to get one out of the cabinet, he was up and next to me.

He placed one of his newly strong hands on my shoulder…

SDYM: Mom, I’ll get it. I don’t want to make a woman do all the work for me.

Me: I’m not a woman. I’m Mom and I love taking care of you.

My Son put both hands on my shoulders and looked me square and lovingly in the eye…

SDYM: And, I’m Ricky II. And I love taking care of you.

Me: 🥺

I had no words. I was stunned.

So, I just stepped aside and let him get the drink.

When he stood up, I planted a kiss on his cheek and gave him a big hug.

He squeezed me back and I noticed for the first time that SDYM now has a strong, man hug.

He completely engulfs His Mother.

I could literally still feel his hug after he walked away.

I was so overcome with emotion that later in the evening, when he left for the home he shares with his father, I had to sit and processed what I was feeling.

Because, the feeling was new and unrecognizable.

I’ve gotten a million hugs from SDYM…but that one felt different.

As I sat and thought, I came to realize that My Child has hugged me at every stage of his life.

As a newborn, when they placed him my arms, his little hand immediately and instinctively knew to hug my finger.

As a baby, when I leaned down to pick him up, he would reach his hands up to me and they would always land around my neck.

As a toddler, whenever he felt scared, nervous, or uncomfortable, he would stay close to me and hug my leg tightly.

As a preschooler, when I would come to pick him up after his preschool day, as soon as he saw me, he would run to me with unbridled excitement, jump on me, and squeeze my neck, while wearing the biggest, most genuine smile.

As a school aged child, whenever he needed comfort, he would wrap his arms around my waist and bury his head in my tummy or my bosom as I rubbed his back and reminded him how much I love him.

As a teen, at every performance or award ceremony, he looks for my face in the crowd. Then afterwards, he finds me and hugs my neck as if to ask, “Mom, are you proud of me?” And, I always say, “Sweet Pea, I’m soooooo proud of you.” Then, he grins widely and plants a kiss on my forehead.

I’m older now, and sometimes make sounds when I bend down and get up. And he watches my every move.

So, his young, strong, and nimble body, immediately and instinctively, knew to come to His Mom’s assistance.

As, I sat in this realization, it hit me.

This Child has loved me his entire life.

Ricky II is the one person in this world who has loved me everyday of his life.

God gave me a person designed to love me every single day of his life.

And all I had to do was love, respect, and take care of him.

Simply, be good to him and keep him safe.

But, God’s goodness doesn’t stop there.

He then placed in me the instinct of a Mother’s love…so I could give this person, designed to love me everyday of his life, all the things required to maintain this beautifully loving relationship.

If that’s not a gift, I don’t know what is.

Children are God’s purest gift.

As parents, we meet our children as adults…with an entire lived experience that doesn’t include them.

However, our children meet us as blank slates designed by God to love us.

My Child is the only person in the world who can say they have loved me EVERY SINGLE DAY of their life.

That’s Why I Go So Hard for My Baby!!!!!!!

Because, he is the embodiment of love and God’s greatest gift to me.

And, when My Son gave me a strong, man hug…I realized that while the hug felt different, it felt EXACTLY the same.

Like a gift of pure love.

I LOVE hugs from My Son.

No matter his age or size, I still get the same rush of warmth that I felt when they placed him in my arms and his little hand knew immediately and instinctively to hug His Mama’s finger.

Thank you, Father God, for my gift of a lifetime of pure love and hugs.  #IfIHadAThousandTongues #ItWouldntBeEnough #Thankyou #HeartSoFull 

Sons, if your mama is still living on earth and the relationship warrants it, next time you see her, hug your mom…with a strong, man hug and let it linger.

I promise you she will feel your hug long after you’re gone and it will bring her comfort.

Just like My Son’s hug did for me.  #BoyMoms #AlwaysOurBabies