Taking the Stress Out of Homework: Grace for Parents, Growth for Kids

Take the frustration out of homework.

By Dr. El Brown

Parents want the best for their children. We want to see them succeed in school, in life, and in every opportunity that comes their way. And every day, families already do so much to make that happen: working jobs, preparing meals, managing schedules, getting children to activities, handling household responsibilities, and still making time for love, laughter, and care.

Homework arrives right in the middle of all of that. It sits at the intersection of family life — at the end of a long day, when everyone is tired and there’s still so much left to do. It’s easy to get frustrated in those moments, especially when you feel like your child should understand the assignment, or when you know it has to be done but you’re racing against bedtime, chores, and everything else on the list.

And here’s the truth: frustration is natural. Homework time can stretch everyone’s patience because it arrives at the end of an already full day, when both parents and children are carrying a lot. Wanting the best for your child and knowing how to teach your child are two very different things.

Teaching is a profession. It is a discipline. It is both a science and an art. Teachers spend years studying how to move a child from objective to outcome — and even with training, it still takes patience, creativity, and skill. So if homework time feels like a struggle, you are not alone. You are not incompetent. You are simply stepping into work that requires a specialized skill set.

The good news is that there are things you can do to make homework less stressful for both you and your child. Here are five tips to help:

1. Create a Homework-Friendly Environment

Set up a quiet, consistent space for your child to work. Keep supplies close by — pencils, paper, calculators — so time isn’t wasted searching. The structure itself reduces frustration.

2. Break It Down

Big assignments can feel overwhelming. Help your child break homework into smaller, more manageable chunks. Celebrate progress along the way so the focus is on effort, not just completion.

3. Focus on Encouragement, Not Perfection

Homework is practice, not performance. Praise persistence, focus, and problem-solving. This builds confidence and keeps the environment positive, even when mistakes happen.

4. Know When to Pause

If either of you is overwhelmed, take a break. A short walk, a snack, or just stepping away can reset both you and your child. Coming back with fresh energy makes a big difference.

5. Consider Outsourcing Support

Sometimes the best option is to bring in help. Virtual learning platforms have made it easier than ever to connect with tutors who specialize in specific subjects. For example, when my son took precalculus, I knew nothing about it — but he had a tutor who met him on Zoom twice a week. That support helped him succeed, and it took the pressure off me to be both mom and math teacher.

The Takeaway

Homework doesn’t have to become a nightly battle. Give yourself grace. Use strategies that make the process smoother. And know that outsourcing is always an option — because at the end of the day, the goal is the same at home and at school: for your child to learn, grow, and succeed.